Jan 24, 2004
Folks, I am not suicidal. I don't know why I feel like I have to state this, but I guess I do make a lot of suicide jokes.
*sigh* I guess this is because I've been suicidal in the past, and when you've seriously contemplated a thing, it makes it seem less scary that you once contemplated it if you joke about it.
Then again, Since I don't intend to commit suicide and have wayed the benifits/losses of such an act, maybe I can just joke about and think about suicide and not worry.
There are some things I have thought out.
1) If I commited suicide, I would definetly leave a note that was long and sad, condemning few and thanking many.
2) I would die to the song "Disposition" by Tool on repeat in the cd player. it wouldn't be loud, just loud enough to hear through a closed door. Unless of course I decided to drive my car off a cliff. which id unlikely, because there are no cliffs in oklahoma.
3) I think I would so a worry free method, something quick and relatively painless, that didn't let me linger on the fact that yes, I did in fact end my own life.
Don't take this seriously. It's more casual a post than I have ever written, I think.
*sigh* I guess this is because I've been suicidal in the past, and when you've seriously contemplated a thing, it makes it seem less scary that you once contemplated it if you joke about it.
Then again, Since I don't intend to commit suicide and have wayed the benifits/losses of such an act, maybe I can just joke about and think about suicide and not worry.
There are some things I have thought out.
1) If I commited suicide, I would definetly leave a note that was long and sad, condemning few and thanking many.
2) I would die to the song "Disposition" by Tool on repeat in the cd player. it wouldn't be loud, just loud enough to hear through a closed door. Unless of course I decided to drive my car off a cliff. which id unlikely, because there are no cliffs in oklahoma.
3) I think I would so a worry free method, something quick and relatively painless, that didn't let me linger on the fact that yes, I did in fact end my own life.
Don't take this seriously. It's more casual a post than I have ever written, I think.
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